Reflections on the Vampyre Community

As we approach the end of the year I have a tendency toward reflection. This year it occurred to me to do some reflection on the Vampyre Community and my relationship with it. Before I begin, my interaction with the community has always been online for the most part. I have never had the opportunity to interact with a large in-person group or organization so my reflections will, well, reflect that. This disclaimer out of the way, let me begin.

What is the Vampyre Community? The obvious answer is that it is a community of people that consider themselves to be vampyres and that is true in the most basic sense. When we examine the motivations for why people that identify as vampyres come together it becomes a little more complicated.

Most vampyres find the online community through searches for the obvious terms: "blood craving," "vampires," "real vampires," etc. Some people are lucky enough to get referred by someone they happen to meet in other spaces. However we arrive here there are a few reasons why people stay. The main reason, I think, is information. Someone newly awakened or newly aware will want some information and it's a lot easier to find it by talking with people who have come before. Feeding methods, donors, symptom management; the basics of the vampyric experience. This is how I first came into contact with the online community all those years ago.

Once the basics are out of the way and the praxis is understood the reasons to remain in the community are usually boiled down to just that: community. Being a vampyre is usually very isolating and I, personally, find it hard to relate to other people. Having a common experience of mutual niche weirdness is a good avenue for getting to know people and making friends. It can be reassuring and helpful to share experiences, feelings, and thoughts with other people experiencing similar things. Sharing struggles, asking for advice, and generally just knowing that you're not alone can make a huge difference. It certainly did for me and still does today.

As is a problem with more "normal" social circles, personal disagreements and drama are bound to happen and anyone that's been in the vampyre community for any length of time knows that we have these issues in abundance. Arguments are not uncommon and grudges die hard. Entire organizations rise and fall because of drama with other organizations under the same Vampyre Community umbrella. Friendships die, reputations are ruined, and yet we persist in our attempt at finding kindred spirits.

The Vampyre Community has broken my heart more times than I can count. I'm certain I'm not alone in that. I think that when we find a group that understands even a small part of us there's a tendency to jump in head first, overextend, and consequently, to get hurt. Sometimes you get hurt badly enough that you have to leave for a while and possibly even deny what you are in an attempt to make everything feel better. Maybe you succeed for a while in putting vampyrism behind you. You can only put off hunger for so long though.

I think that vampyres have a drive to find each other. Sure, we disagree, we fight, we make up, we fight again, we leave, but most people come back eventually. We would do well to maybe not take ourselves so seriously given the entire premise, viewed from the perspective of an outsider, but it's difficult not to take it seriously when the stakes are so high. I think that ultimately the entire Vampyre Community is just a quest to belong. The labels change, the groups form, dissolve, and then reform, but I think we're all just wanderers trying to find another light in the darkness. I think we'd all do well to try and shine a little brighter.